A Season of Struggle

This has been a long spring. And I know it’s summer now, but it feels like life hasn’t stopped since spring began. It has been a very busy show season, rushing from one production to the next, with a lot of traveling in between. While I wish I could say it has all been good things, honesty is the best policy, right?

It’s been tough, especially earlier. I won’t go into details, but I have had a definite lack of motivation to do anything. If you know me, you know my superpower is ultimate self-motivation, but it appears I’ve found my kryptonite.

And it’s right where I need to be to write.

I’ve been too busy or too depressed to write for a long time, but God has been very graciously lifting my heart up from the pit, but only just enough to get my feet planted again.

In the past couple months of struggle, it has also given me a lot of time to reflect. I’m not really one to just crumble without at least trying to figure out why I’m crumbling, and there was a lot that jumped out at me. There was a lot hiding under the surface that stressful and suffocating circumstances pulled out.

But now I can deal with them. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right?

I’ve been working on The Blessed for a little while now, just getting going, but then all of this hit and I stepped away. I was no longer in the same place; I was unable to connect with my MC. She is much stronger than I am right now, and she is learning lessons that I’m not ready to tackle.

And my thoughts drifted to Colors to Stars [working title].I slowly began to realize that I was exactly where Bronwyn, the MC, is at the beginning of that story.

This all came at the right moment because not only am I very vulnerable and in need of a story to journey through, but the Ted Dekker transformative writing course is also being offered. It’s expensive and in the past it was impossible to afford, but thanks to my parents and in-laws (and an advance on birthday and Christmas gifts) I am able to take the class!

The Creative Way course begins on July 10th, complete with a devotional that accompanies the workbook and videos. I am beyond excited about this opportunity, because I know that God is going to use it to not only grow me as a storyteller, but as His child, a child of the King of Kings.

So, all that to say, I’m still alive and kicking. Boy, am I kicking hard right now. I’ll be back at writing as soon as I start the class, which is right around the same time that our musical FAIRYTALE will be premiering in Charlotte, NC.

A lot of the quotes that inspired Colors to Stars have become increasing encouraging to me, so I’ll end this post by sharing a few of them with you:

Only in the darkness can you see the stars.
(Martin Luther King)

To trust God in the light is nothing; to trust God in the darkness – that is faith.
(Charles Spurgeon)

Turn to the light, do not fear the shadows it creates.
(Ted Dekker)

All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.
(St. Francis Of Assisi)

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