Rewriting the Stars

I finished my re-write of POLARITY (previously under the working title Colors to Stars) last week and I am very thankful to see how I have grown since writing those final words. At the end of the first draft, I was very emotionally raw. I knew what I needed to say to my main character, to myself, but I wasn’t ready to accept it:

“I think if I let it go, it’s like giving her a free pass for everything.”
Jason nodded. “Maybe it is. But maybe it gives you some kind of freedom too.”
“Maybe.”

And that was the end. Maybe. Certainly not revenge, but only maybe forgiveness. When I finished that first draft, I knew what lesson I had to learn – to let go of revenge and justice as paths to find true freedom from the past. The theory had been tested in my story, and I could see the results.

After a month of space, I dove into re-writing, and while so much of the story still rings true, when I arrived that that final word, “Maybe”, it felt insufficient. But I’m still stuck on the same thing as my MC at the end.

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Two Birds, One Stone

Yesterday, I won NaNoWriMo. 50k in 19 days.

Today, I finished the rough draft for Colors to Stars, (which is going to need a real title soon), totally at 73,056 words.

It is bittersweet to finish a project, especially one that has had so much of my heart in it. But it has been a very good journey so far, and especially in these past couple of days of writing I’ve had a lot of great personal insights. Some encouraging, but mostly convicting.

I’ve realized there are things I have been holding on to, thinking that they might help heal so many wounds. I’ve discovered that these things, which I explore in this novel, some times give temporary relief, or satisfcation, but they always demand more. And the price they require is great, one I am not willing to pay.Read More »